A collection of random things

No writing in a while makes me a sad man. Writing now, again—that makes me happy. Here are some Random Thoughts:

I came home and the house across the street was naked. A tree too big for arms sat and grew there my whole life. Now it is chopped down and there is only a stump left. I decided that I will write a note and put it on the stump. The note will go like this:

I am a stump,
It's sad to see.
At the very least,
Please sit on me?

Two nights ago I was Very Content—it made me feel like I could evaporate. No, not quite—I felt my molecules slowly separate, like they carefully shed their charge and drifted lazily away so I was just a collection of atoms in air.

I love crane flies but on accident I keep killing them. They are so so fragile. They are everywhere in our house always glittering around the edges of my eyes. I find them and I try to catch them and rescue them and put them outside in the night, but all I do is crush their legs in the gaps between my fingers. Sometimes they die all on their own—they drown themselves on the counter in slips of thin water. I want to say hey you're so stupid stop flying inside there's nothing good in here for you, but the air conditioning is on, and it is awful nice, and so I can't blame them.

I hated Making a Move. In high school—I could never do it right.

Hey man, you were with her last night? Did you make a move?

What, you took her to the movies? So did you make a move?

Dude, I made a move last night. You did? Yeah. You did? Yeah.

Because in high school how the hell are you supposed to know when to Make a Move, and how are you supposed to know when to go in for you first kiss, and how are you supposed to know how to use your lips and what Feels Good, and how are you supposed to, and how are you supposed to

High school was filled with a lot of How Are You Supposed To...?s My first kiss on the lips ever was with my friend C.W. It was in the script of a play. And I tried to play it cool because I'm a junior in high school and of course I've had my first kiss already. No—I was all sweat and butterflies, and I went in and pecked her on the lips and I felt weird and I was both thankful and sad. Sad because it had taken me until I was 17 to get my first kiss, thankful because it was C.W. and I love her and it's a Pretty Cool Thing that she was my first kiss. Plus, I knew to Make a Move, because it said in the script, He kisses her.

Are you ever with an insecure person and a Wishing Event happens? You find an eyelash, there's a shooting star, the clock turns 11:11—point is, they say, Make a wish. Everyone's done that. But have you ever been with an insecure person who loves you and they say, Make a wish, but what they really said was, Make a wish about me and about us, please. And then they ask, Did you make a good wish? But what they really said was, Did you make a wish about me? And that makes me upset and it makes me feel like my dreams have to be about another person and I don't like that. Maybe I want to make a wish about you, maybe I don't. But don't hijack my wishes.